Friday, August 04, 2006

Florence: City of Cocks

Slutty (it's actually one of my nicknames, a story for another time)

Here is a word I learnt quite quickly when I was in Denmark, argueably the most boring place on this earth (that could be because I'm not really into blonds but I do tend to assess on a girth by girth basis so I don't think it really was the excessive amounts of blonds getting around). It actually means 'sale' or something like that but I prefer it to mean a spirt (spurt) of sluttiness, although I don't think that gal in the pic looks like a slut. Having said that with a smile like that it looks as if she's just spotted her prey and is about to release her inner whore.

A beautiful view of Florence taken whilst on the three hour short cut to god knows where. Post wanker.

I'm spoiling you rotten, yet again, my pretties. I have dug into the archives and dragged out some pics of the first time I was in Florence in December. Ah yes! I remember it like it was yesterday! I took a wrong turn after lunch, strolling through some streets minding my own business when a punter obviously admired The Cherry. So much so, viewers, that he actually took the time to get off his Vesper and then actually proceed to get off, by way of masturbation right there on the pavement. Now this happened to me reguarly when I lived in Japan at the ripe old age of 17, but in Japan I would literally laugh in their faces. Something they were not accustomed to and I'm pretty sure they would have consequently lost their erection. I must be getting boring as time goes on because I didn't have time for this wanker of the Florence variety. Not even to laugh in his face for old times sake. I simply sighed and waited for a car to come along and scare the freak show off. I mean really what was he hoping to achieve? I'm all for GYCO (Getting Your Cocks Out) but this was too much too take on a full stomach.

A piazza full of cock

As you can see in the above photo (well not exactly clearly) there's many a cock flashing statue in Florence. It really is my kind of city. I did waste alot of time that day though, with the wrong turn which took me circa three hours to get back to the train station which was pretty cool actually because there were lots of fabulous houses to look at. I also a great looking roof. Yes roof, for some reason I have a thing for rooves. Anyway, so away I went in the direction of said roof searching all over the place and then I finally found it. Turned out to be a Jewish synogogue. Not exactly the slice of Italian culture I was after, nor was the al fresco masturbator for that matter. One slice of Florence I did fall in love with was the Statue of David. Be still my beating heart, that is one amazing sculpture! WOW! And I'm not just saying it because his cock out for all to admire. Hell no. I could stand there and admire that piece of art for hours......*sigh*

Taken from Ponte Vecchio. It took some intestinal fortitude not to throw myself off the bridge or go on a rampage due to the sickeningly high levels of PDA (Public Displays of Affection) going on around me.

My walk down memory lane is now complete as far as Florence is concerned and now I urge you to come back to the present. Back to the Slutspurt I'm going through. Well, that's not exactly true because I have only frolicked with one of them. So last night I went out with the guy that accosted me on Tuesday night. He was supposed to pick me up at 6.30pm and called at that time and said he was leaving his house. I liked this. It gave me 20minutes to just stand there and stare at myself in the mirror and have my critical eye assess my hair. I was having a perfect hair day, which is damn near impossible for me, but it was all ruined by the humidity and the rain. Well I had an umbrella but as soon as a slight bit of moisture gets anywhere near one strand it's all over! We went for dinner. Lots of food, way too much, but it was delicious seafood. Jimmi (strange name for an Ital, methinks) After that we went to a few places for a drink.

This is a copy of the Statue of David. You can't take photos of the real one. Bummer.

One of the places we went to was XXL (which BTW did I mention was quite fitting given Jimmi's crotch is definitely on the XXL side of life! I could hardly drag my eyes away from it and found it difficult to be discreet!!!). This is the place we drank 5000 drinks at during the World Cup. Anyway, I was going to the bathroom and a guy says to me 'Your the Australian!' I immediately thought 'Thank fuck I'm getting the hell out of here! This town is shrinking on me!' hahaha! Turns out it was none other than Red Card Elvis!!!! Hahaha!! Can you believe that shit?!?! He was quite nice actually and wants to do something on Sunday. I said yes, but may cancel. I'm yet to decide. He still crapped on about me being in Milano. I have no idea where he initially got that idea from. I know I told him I was in Milano when he asked but that was just to get rid of him. Then on the way back fromthe bathroom I heard some fans calling my name. Turns out it was 'just friends' Davide and co chowing down on some tucker. I said hello, gave them my autograph and then went back to Jimmi.

I just like this building for some reason.

So Jimmi is actually a really, really cool guy. Very chilled, not out to prove anything. Speaks not a word of English and talks as though I can understand every word he says in Italian (ie normal velocity and words he would use when speaking to native Ital). He wants to go to Forte Dei Marmi tonight to a disco and then to the beach tomorrow. I think I'll cancel Plan B which will be a booty call scenario anyway. I'd rather go dancing in a new locale with Jimmi and his sizeable crotch.

I'd now like to take the opportunity to wish everyone a fantastic cock filled weekend!

Over and out!

Love & kisses cherubs!

Cher xxx

Posted by Cherry! :: 10:37 am :: 31 fans want a piece of The Cherry!

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